Welcome to the Gary Winchester in REAL Life podcast episode 2, I am your host Gary Winchester. This podcast is all about my life as a full time stay at home dad, Essential Ōil Guy and co-founder of Winchester Ōils.
In this episode I will talk about seasons in life, how expectation of balance is there to set you up for failure and discuss the fact that comparison kills.
Seasons in Life
There are many different seasons in our lives. For this podcast it is season 2, episode 2. So far in this season we begin with a fresh start, a clean slate, because we are beginning our new year in a new way. This is the most energetic and enthusiastic part of my year because I have no baggage. For some reason I have this ability to drop my old baggage from last year at the doorstep of last year. All that crap I carried in 2017 just got dumped on December 31st.
In this new season I feel invigorated, encouraged and courageous. I feel like I can and will conquer the world. Starting a new year does something for me. Does it do anything for you?
Our year has multiple seasons, sometimes more than the typical seasons each year and sometimes less. It all depends on what life throws at you and how you handle it.
This is exactly why this is season 2 episode number 2.
Balance is bull shirt!
For many years I heard the word balance like it’s something achievable. It’s not! Not when you have kids and you have a LOT of responsibilities with your home and business. I particularly struggle with balance because I am an all or nothing guy, I get laser focused on a subject and have a difficult time transitioning into the next task.
Even with this type of struggle I see how it impacted my life and all those around me when I tried to achieve perfect balance. I have learned some days I will simply excel as a stay at home dad while falling short on fulfilling all my responsibilities as a business partner. Other days I will fall short as a stay at home dad. It’s not that I only do business or parenting, it’s that when I try to achieve the perfect balance to both I fail even worse.
I know this to be true for me and I know I am not alone in this. Although many times I do feel like I am the only one who struggles with this I know in reality I am not.
I find that perfect balance is not on a day to day goal but on a week to week or month to month goal. Balance is more big picture than in the trenches.
I see other people in business succeeded by making millions, people buying homes at a young age and parents that look like they got it all together. Honestly I would constantly compare myself to them, finding all of the areas I fell short in. The reality of it is that they have different circumstances or situations than me.
Growing up so many of my friends at church thought I had the perfect family, the reality was that I struggled every day with trying to be the perfect kid while failing at it all the time. The expectation to be the perfect kid was killing me. It drove me to my first suicide attempt at 13 and did not stop there. I was constantly feeling guilty, not worthy and ashamed.
This sucked the life out me. It wasn’t until I was in my mid 20’s when I realized I don’t have to be like someone else or pretend to be someone I am not. I can be a real person flaws and all. It was nice to be accepted. Then I fell back into that comparison trap when I started my business. I put this crazy pressure on myself to be successful instantly. I had to be like all the big names in marketing, but I struggled to measure up.
I have learned over the last year that if I am just focused on being the best me I can be then I will find success. We all have different measures of success but if we are bing ourselves then success is inevitable.
Let’s wrap this episode up like Christmas present for you.
In this episode I talked about the seasons in life and that this season is fresh start because the year just started. Also talked about how balance is not really achievable, at least for people like me. And talked about we should not compare ourselves to others because we may never measure up.
Hope this helps you grow in your life and helps your journey.
Thank you for listening! If you found this episode helpful please share it and leave me a review wherever you watch this from. Have a fantastic 2018! Until next time stay healthy.